Dots of Memories
by frozenalchemy
Summary: Rukia lost her sight, traps in memories. Orihime lost her memory, disappears, & turns into a hooker. Ichigo, stuck in between the two. Which is more painful? A lost love, or a forgotten past? IchiRuki. 1sided IchiHime. REWRITTEN. AU


Author's note: REWRITTEN! Rating might be change in the future chapters.

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Chapter 1 – Sparks of Orange: Goodbyes

He remembered the first time he met her, summer, 15 years ago. She stood in front of his house, reaching out her hand for him, grinning so wide like a fool. She was small, as ever, short, and bouncy. Yet that petite body of hers contained a seemingly unlimited amount of energy. Behind her, was a red haired boy, about the same age as him, with eyebrows twitching ever so slightly at his direction, glaring, as if was asking for a fight.

"_Yo! I'm Rukia!" she spoke loudly. "And that's Renji over there." Her hand was pointing to the direction of the red haired boy. "Welcome to the Karakura City!"_

_He nodded, almost timidly, staring at the girl in front of him. _

"_What's your name?"_

"_Ichigo," he mumbled._

He just lost his mother, the one person he treasured the most in his life; the person whose smile was enough to brighten up his days. He remembered, right before her death… in the middle of that rainy night… she was holding his hand, gripping it tightly, with a weak voice coming out of her. _"It's okay, Ichigo. Everything's alright now. It's okay."_

But it wasn't alright. His family moved into Karakura City, with hope that they would start a new life, and that time would heal their wounds soon enough. But for Ichigo, his head had been in cloud ever since.

Three months had passed, and standing before him, in front of his new house, was Rukia, grinning to him in a childlike way._ "It's okay!" she chirped. "You're not going to be alone here as a new kid!"_

_He looked at her, unsure what to say, "…Aa…"_

"_You have me and Renji! Now come on! Let's play!" and she pulled him away._

Rukia was far different from his mother. His mother's smile was kind, tender, and full of understanding, while hers was bright, innocent, and reassuring. Yet both of them shared one similarity: the comfort that he felt whenever he was with them.

Ichigo, Rukia, and Renji…

…The three unrepeatable best friends. They were barely five, innocent, immature, and full of hope. As kids, they fought a lot. Sometimes, even for the stupidest and simplest reasons. They would fight about who gets to play in the slide first, who gets the biggest piece of chocolate bars. But at the end of the day, their three small hands would be holding unto each other again, walking into sunset with smiles on their faces.

Those days will never end. That was what they were thinking, or wished to think. Every day, they walked on the same route to home, under the sunset, hand in hand.

Like a perfect snapshot of a true happiness.

Perhaps, deep down in their hearts, they knew that someday, one day in the future, a series of coincidences and fate will separate them away, making them taking their own different paths. But who cares? They promised, didn't they?

"_So let's all promise that we're going to be together until we are like grandma and grandpas!"_

"_Yeah!"_

What was it? A fraction of naivety? A wishful thinking? Or even the simplicity of hope?

But that was being young is all about, and the advantage of it all. Stubbornness and hope went hand in hand. Because, when they were young, they could actually believe that, in the end, everything would be okay... that fairytales came true after all.

Promises are meant to be kept. But the more they treasured it, the easier it seemed to be broken.

---

"_Ichigo, I'm gonna ask her out," he said out of the sudden. "I hope you don't mind."_

_This was during their second year in high school. He fixed his gaze on Renji. It took him a few moments to understand what happened. He knew that he no longer had any choice in the matter._

"_No," he replied. "I don't mind." _

_What else could he say to him? _No, you cannot ask her out because I love her too?_ That would be absurd._

_He himself could never bring himself to express his feelings to Rukia. He wasn't feeling betrayed or angry. If, in fact, he was angry, it was at himself. For Renji and Rukia to become lovers was the most natural thing in the world. He convinced himself so. _

"_Cool!" Renji said with a huge grin. "You were the only one I was worried about. I mean, the three of us had such a great thing going, and well… The main thing is that I want the three of us to go on being friends, right?"_

"_Yeah, sure," _

---

16 years has passed since then. Ichigo stood by the kitchen window of his apartment, thinking of the good old _once upon a time._ He smiled at the memory, and looked at the calendar sitting on the table. 31st August was circled with a blue marker.

"Happy Birthday, pal," he murmured to the empty room, and grabbed the phone.

"Hello?" answered a voice from the other line.

"Rukia?" he replied.

"Oh hi, Ichigo… I'm just taking a walk."

"I see,"

A soft laugh was heard, "Relax," she answered. "I got Yuki right here with me," she added, indicating the white dog in front of her.

"All right then, just be careful, okay?"

"Ichigo!" her voice grew annoyed. "I'm not a kid anymore!"

He sighed. "Aa, see you later."

Usually, he wouldn't let her walk alone. But today was an exception. He could hear it in her voice, the edgy tone of restlessness that she was trying to hide. Ichigo too, was unable to fully hide his restlessness. It was that particular day… _his _birthday… Renji's. That they could not celebrate for he was dead, taken away from the two years ago in a tragedy which they could never forget… and never wished to remember.

Two hours later, Rukia came home. She slowly walked through the door into the living room, taking each step carefully.

"Ichigo," she said quietly.

"Yo," He answered.

"It's this day again, eh?" her voice was calm and still. She took a sit on the couch, and turned at him. Her stare was blank, looking, without seeing.

He nodded, and replied weakly, "Yeah."

"Ne, Ichigo," she gestured her hand for him to sit next to her. "It's been two years, isn't it?"

"Aa," he answered.

She continued to stare into the distance, her hands reaching forward for a moment, before bringing it down. "I'm tired of being in the middle of this darkness, Ichigo," she whispered. Her voice was still even, yet with a hint of pain.

He looked at her and nodded.

---

_It was right after her birthday party. The three went for a walk, and that was when it happened. Rukia saw a cat in the middle of a quiet street, and decided to take a closer look at it. It was in the middle of the night. So what the hell, nobody really warned her not to cross the road. They were rather drunk, happy, and careless. _

_And then, out of the sudden, a truck came by, full speed, a drunken driver- the kind of classic accident. Renji spotted it first. She was still kneeling down on the road, hands holding the kitten. Ichigo could still remember it so clearly. Everything seemed like a flash._

_On one second, Renji shouted her name, "RUKIA!" she turned, and the truck was already a few meters away from her._

_The next thing was that Renji's body was on the other side of the road, unmoving. A puddle of blood leaked from his head, staining the road. Under him, was Rukia, lying unconscious. Ichigo watched everything, from the other side of the road, paralyzed. It took a moment before everything sunk in. _

…What the fuck just happened?

_Was his brain always worked so slowly? He yelled up their names, running toward them. The ambulance came a few minutes later, and in the end, Ichigo had done nothing to help them. He merely was the one to witness the tragedy on her 19__th__ birthday._

_Renji had died immediately in the spot, while Rukia, she was hauled into the hospital, and stayed there for a few weeks long. Ichigo visited her everyday, bringing her new flowers, and held her hand for hours long. He prayed, nonstop, to a god who he never knew._

"_I'm sorry, Rukia," he whispered to her over, and over again. She didn't reply. Her eyes still closed, unaware to her surrounding._

_She woke up ten days later._

"_You're finally awake," he said weakly._

"_Where's Renji?" she asked. Ichigo froze in the spot. _

Where's Renji?_ He could not reply._

_Yet she seemed to realize the truth, without anyone saying it for her. She understood from the way Ichigo spoke to her, and from the silence she felt. _

"_Rukia, here's the new flower for you. From one of the relatives, I guess," he said, handing the flower to her. _

_She reached her hand, yet touched nothing but the air. It took her several tries until she managed to grab the flowers from his hand. He frowned and froze again. "Rukia?"_

_She stayed silent for a while. Holding the flowers tightly she whispered, "Yeah. I cannot see."_

_--_

It's been two years since then. Two years since all she could see was the pure blackness.

Ichigo held her close, and whispered to her the all too familiar sentence again. "I'm sorry, Rukia."

That night, he sat down in a small, quiet all night bar, sipping his drink quietly, savoring the warmth in his throat. Damn, he thought. He hated every 31st August in the past two years. There weren't many people drinking at that night. Alone and quiet, the way he wanted it to be. There was a soft music playing in the background, a woman singing a melody which lyrics he could not quite catch.

Ichigo was used to watch how people walked away from his live, to somewhere he could never reach. There was Misaki, his mother at first, taken away, before he could even realized what was going on. Then, which he could never forgive himself for, was Renji's death. He wasn't much of a doctor, but he did grew up in a clinic... meaning that he could've done something to help him them then. But no, he panicked.

And in those minutes, before the ambulance even came… Renji went away from him. And just like Misaki, he went without a proper goodbye.

He turned for a moment, facing the singer, standing on a small stage in the corner of the bar. She seemed to be around the same age as him, with long orange hair, wearing a knee length black dress. He took another sip, and closed his eyes, returning into his previous thought.

Next, was Rukia, he thought. Who though he could still see, but all the same, she was someone, that would never be his. She was Renji's, and she still is.

Nothing has changed ever since. He knew in every second they speak to each other, she was in somewhere else; a place, which he could never reach. And as time was slowly ticking by, he knew that the best option was to stop chasing her.

There was also Inoue, the pretty little princess in high school. He liked her, there was no doubt. Inoue was a great girl, cheerful, and cute- the kind of a perfect girlfriend. Yet when he held her close, and kissed her… sometimes, without warning… in a sudden, out of pure nothingness… _her_ face appeared in his head.

_Rukia._

How long did their relationship go? A year? It was a stable, peaceful relationship. Almost too peaceful. They didn't get into any fights. Nobody could pick a fight with Inoue. She was way too sweet, too gentle. And that was exactly why he could never feel a complete ease when he was with her.

There was something missing. Always.

"_Do you like me Kurosaki kun?" she asked._

_He nodded. "Of course," he answered. He had no reason not to._

But if she was to ask him if he loves her, then he would either lie, or breaks her heart.

Because he loves only Rukia. Since the first time he ever saw her smile.

---

_  
_And yet, everything changed, yet again.

"_Inoue wouldn't be joining this class anymore,"_ said the teacher one day.

The day Ichigo heard about the announcement, all he could do, was to freeze in his sit, and kept quiet, unable to find the right question to ask. His classmates stayed quiet too, not daring to ask him a single question about her disappearance. The only people who asked him about it, was Rukia and Renji. He answered he did not know the reason. Wild guesses, tales, and gossips spread everywhere, yet nobody knew the real reason. Not even him.

Now that he thought about it, maybe the real reason Inoue vanished, without a trace. Because she knew that he never truly loved her. And she felt pain, behind those smiles of hers.

Yet she kept quiet, afraid of asking him about the truth.

What mattered back then was the comfort that each other felt when they were holding onto each other, the way they enjoyed each other company, and the security in knowing that they were not alone.

---

How many years ago was that? Four? Memories work in such a strange way. Sometimes they hide away in the back of his head. And then the next thing he knew, he was recalling them with vivid images as if they happened yesterday.

He looked at the singer again. Their eyes met for a second, and he could feel his body heating up. She didn't even seem to notice him, and continued to sing. Her voice was sweet and soft, almost familiar. Where did he hear that before? …Long orange hair, clipped on one side.

No way… Inoue? Nah, it couldn't be.

He was told that the world is a small place. But what are the chances that he was going to meet her again? Almost next to zero, he thought. What made him think of these memories in _this _particular day?

Ichigo took the last sip of his drink, and stood up, walking outside. The wind was blowing slightly, and the moon was huge, and perfectly round. That's right, he thought. The moon was exactly like this one two years ago, the night the accident happened.

He pictured the woman singing in the bar earlier. It couldn't be Inoue, he told himself that. First of all, she wouldn't be singing in a small deserted bar like that. She was a smart student, always on top of the class. It shouldn't be hard for her, with that look and brain of hers, to get a decent job somewhere… anywhere, but that bar. And why would she appear in front of him after all these years? But then, how many orange haired girls with the same age of him are there?

He could not think properly anymore.

There are just too many coincidences. Everything seems to be speeding up, rushing toward one destination.

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Review?

-frozenalchemy✖


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